Why the Wii?

Remember the Power Glove for Nintendo? No?! Well for those of you that don’t, it looked something like this:

It was for Nintendo… and it totally sucked. My brother and I got this elaborate piece of crap most likely after begging our parents to buy it. Although it was a long time ago, I remember waving my hand around trying to get Mario to jump and becoming incredibly frustrated by his non-responsive diet-needing ass. Was it Mario’s fault? Of course not, perhaps it was due to the fact that you had to be wired like Robocop to get the damn thing to work. That flashy ad above is great and all, but look at this thing:

“The glove was somewhat difficult to use; in order for the glove to register with the ultrasonic sensors, one had to keep their knuckles pointing at them at all times. In addition, since each finger had 4 positions, it is difficult to have disparate fingers in different positions simultaneously. Thus, while it was possible to control 16 different states simultaneously, most people have difficulty keeping the ring and index fingers straight, while bending the middle finger. [-wikipedia]” Somewhat difficult to use? Somewhat… try impossible. Unless you are a master finger pupeteer you ain’t getting shit done with this thing.

Now Nintendo has been hard at work developing the Wii. Anyone who has heard about the Wii knows about it’s unique motion-sensitive remote. Umm… is it just me or is this thing the Power Glove all over again? Sure technology has come a long way and it’s wireless, but that doesn’t eliminate the fact that motion-sensing remotes aren’t for traditional console gaming. I really cannot see how this remote is going to make a game that much more fun. I’m sorry Nintendo, but do you really expect me to stand up in front of my TV and play virtual paintbrush or a thrilling round of golf with that thing? Just think, you too can look almost as cool as these kids:

The remote will appeal to kids between the ages of 5-11… anyone older than that… I have a hard time believing they will be standing in front of their TV for hours on end battling through Red Steel trying to make themselves think they really have a sword in their hands. However, I have yet to actually try the Wii’s remote, so I’m mostly speculating here… it is Nintendo after all, hopefully the Wii’s remote won’t suck as bad as the Power Glove.

One Response to “Why the Wii?”

  1. croxis Says:

    I have a question for you. Why did the Wii demo lines at this year’s E3 reach 4-6 hours at some points in the day? Why have reviews of people who actually used the device range from “needs a smidgen of work but optimistic” to “OMG I’M FANBOI!!!!!!”? My brother’s best friend went to E3 and did the demo of the game and was very impressed by it.

  2. buckwheats Says:

    I think the lines reached so long because it was something new, it was innovative. I’m not saying that the Wii remote sucks, I personally haven’t tried it. In all reality it won’t ‘totally suck’ or else Nintendo wouldn’t be developing it as their sole controller. I just don’t think it is going to have the controllability and flexibility that a traditional remote currently offers. Besides, what if a bee attacks you and you are left swatting at it and end up slicing your NPC in half? 😉

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